"Little faith will bring your souls to Heaven,
but great faith will bring heaven to your souls."
~C.H. Spurgeon
He has enough of whatever we need…we just have to believe it!
Hope in the Hideous
"The very tabernacle of God was covered with badgers' skins…one would not think there would be any glory there. The Shekinah of God was manifest under that kind of covering." ~C.H.P. (Streams in the Desert)
The inside of the tabernacle in the Old Testament held
beautiful materials of linen in blue, purple and scarlet;
fine vessels of gold;
lovely tables of solid wood;
decor of silver;
veils of fine linen.
All of that beauty on the inside, covered by badgers' and rams' skins…
A rough exterior to hold a wondrous interior.
But God was there.
"And there I will meet with thee, and I will commune with thee from above the mercy seat…" Exodus 25:22a
We come to see the magnificent beauty of God, often, in the distasteful things of life.
Let us not shy away from the hideous, but embrace it;
and find the glory of God where we least expect it.
Hope When We Don’t Understand
Some days I read the Word, and it is not enough. So, I read on, seeking an answer in its pages.
Other days, I read one verse, and it is too much. My mind staggers at the promise, the reality, of all that God is.
On these days, I echo the father of the demon-possessed child in Mark 9:24 –
"And straightway the father of the child cried out, and saith with tears,
Lord, I believe; help thou mine unbelief."
We don't have to get it right – knowing the entirity of God's personality and wisdom.
We simply keep going to the Word, letting it fill our minds with It's truth.
His Holy Spirit gives us exactly what we need for each day.
Even when we don't understand, we still believe.
Happy Anniversary to Isaac, Doug and Me!!!
It is the 10-YEAR anniversary of Isaac's Gotcha Day!
I remember that day with as much clarity as a mommy who shares her child's birth story. What a wonderful day, and what a miracle it was to bring home our baby boy.
We love you, Ikey-doo! Thank you for bringing so much joy and laughter into our home!
Hope When I See Sin
"The closer you are to the Light, the more dirt you see." ~a.k.c.
"Behold, thou desirest truth in the inward parts: and in the hidden part thou shalt make me to know wisdom." Psalm 51:6
Don't lose hope when you continue to see sin in your life, when you are continually convicted of pride, sin and selfishness. Our goal is to be like Jesus. That doesn't happen all in one fell swoop. As we draw closer to Him, learn more of Him, we see just how far we are to being truly Christ-like.
The Holy Spirit will point out sin "in the inward parts." Our job is to repent of that sin, and walk in obedience to Christ.
We may be appalled by the grit, grime and dirt on the window of our heart; but how brightly Jesus will shine through, as we allow His Word to wash us clean!
Hope in the Impossible
"If a man is admitted into the bullion vault of a bank, and told to help himself, and comes out with one cent, whose fault is it that he is poor?
Whose fault is it that Christian people generally have such scanty portions of the free riches of God?" ~McLaren
"And Jesus said unto them, Because of your unbelief: for verily I say unto you, If ye have faith as a grain of mustard seed, ye shall say unto this mountain, Remove hence to yonder place; and it shall remove; and nothing shall be impossible unto you."
Matthew 17:20
So What’s Going On with Isaac?
I know you all like to know how's he doing, so here's a nice, long update for you.
On the sleeping front – Isaac has slept several nights in a row. We are ecstatic about that, as you can well imagine.
About three weeks ago, his neurologist increased one of his meds, and we have seen wonderful results. He is sleeping at night. His vision to his left has increased. He is looking to the left and is noticing things in his peripheral vision on both sides.
~In our backyard, reaching for a potted plant~
There are also some results that are not so wonderful. He has an opinion about everything. He wants all of his needs/wants met NOW, and he doesn't like to be corrected.
~I call this his "I can't believe she just told me 'No!' face"!!!~
His manual dexterity has increased and his strength has seemingly tripled. Both of those things lead to pinching others and grabbing his tubes and syringes during feeds.
So the seizures are under better control, but Ike is NOT!!!
I know — it's kinda funny and kinda not. I'm glad his little brain is working better; but it's hard to figure out how to discipline and train a child who has no idea how strong he is, does not understand he is hurting other people, can't reason right or wrong, and has no concept of time.
We are using many of the same phrases we used when he was younger before the seizures started. We figure those may at least sound familiar:
- "No pinching!"
- "Easy…"
- "Be patient."
- "No tubie!"
- "No hands."
- "First…then."
- "Inside voice."
It seems like a lot of negative things, doesn't it? But most of Isaac's interactions are very positive. We rarely have cause to scold him, except when he's experiencing these new levels of mental clarity and he has to be reminded of things. Honestly, he still doesn't fully understand some of the phrases we use, but we try to be consistent and firm and show him what we mean.
I would guess that is much like parenting a "normal" toddler, right? 🙂
On the nutritional front – Isaac weighed in at 68.3 pounds at his weigh-in last month. We have had to accept a new formula for him, and we were not happy about that. The only all-food based formula (Compleat) is no longer covered by his insurance company. We did check into buying it ourselves, but it would be roughly $600 a month!
So we are giving him a formula that his insurance company will cover, but we are not pleased with the amount of sugar and synthetic additives in it. We talked to the gastro doctor about that today. He said there was no way to get the insurance to cover the other formula. :o(
Some things we can change. Some things we can't.
On the vehicle front – we still do not have a wheelchair-accessible vehicle. Doug is still carrying Isaac to the truck and quite precariously getting him into his carseat. It is getting harder and harder, because Isaac is getting so heavy and so long.
We are doing research right now, and have heard about a company that may alter a mini van for him at no cost. Now we just praying that the Lord will bring a van to us that we can afford…um, basically a free one would be really great! 🙂
On the mommy and daddy front – Doug is enjoying teaching SO much! I am so grateful that the Lord has given him this opportunity. I have been doing "ok." My back has actually not been too painful lately. I started taking a couple of supplements that seem to be helping. I thought I was finally going to get back to church and singing this past week. Unfortunately, I was sidelined with a horrible cold and sinus infection. I am finally feeling better now.
Doug and I had a really nice morning today, as he had the day off. We went out to a yummy (completely unhealthy) breakfast at Denny's. Then we went to a couple of quaint stores in a nearby town. One was an antique store, where I found some fabulous vintage buttons to use in my jewelry; and the other was full of all sorts of cutesy stuff and an entire wall of Vera Bradley! It was ni-i-i-i-ice! I was finally able to see the purses "in real life", instead of just pictures online. I definitely found a style that I really liked and made sure Doug saw that one, too! 🙂
Afterwards, we took Ike to Orlando for the visit with the gastro doctor I mentioned above, and made one important stop on the way home:
~I've discovered I like Barnie's caramel macchiato and that we love Whole Foods hummus!~
Well, I guess that's it for us…congrats to you, if you persevered to the end!
Thanks for reading,
Alesha
Obtaining Mercy 